Ben Bonkoske

A madman, yes. Stupid, just practically. Questions, probably a few, Scratch what I said about being able to maintain focus on a daily routine. I went off the rails. Staying up later, running unannounced, and reading around seven books at once. If I saw exactly how much time I had between now and when I die, like a clock that diminished hour by hour until I was 100 years old, I might be a little less…comfortable. I haven’t even done the hard part for what I need to do. Well…maybe I don’t give myself enough credit. I have renounced all worldly possessions except for books and have decided to go back to the grind. I’m so serious I’ve spent nearly a week on one chapter. Inspiration strikes every night at 9 o’clock sharp. I think it is an ugly thing when a person thinks they can be an artist for a living, if they have rich parents (which I do, but who won’t support me) you might as well be a 2 out of 10. Unfuckable. I am at that point in my life where I would rather die a virgin than to digress from my rigorously flexible routine of sweet tea and reading. I’m so slow it is hysterical. It is like watching a monkey masturbate, it would be entertaining if you were in my mind, BUT, also misleading. I think there is a lot of things I miss when I read, which makes for an absent-minded author. My first book is terrible. The second will be unreadable. I have been told to throw it out by my only editor. Time is so unfair, but I’m happy to be older.