Ben Bonkoske

Being in a relationship is like listening to music. Occasionally you need some peace and quiet in order to orchestrate your thoughts. However, as Nietzsche said, “Without music, life would be a mistake.” When all is said and done, I don’t want to cut anyone who makes me smile out of my life. It might result in a funny unhealthy obsession. Looking forward to an infinite playlist when I just can’t accept that I am going to play solo. It brings tears to my eyes that there isn’t really enough of everything else to make me want to stick around after class. I just don’t want to think of my life as a compromise, and then lose everything. That is the funny part of it all, I already don’t have much. What hurts is when you recognize how little that is without someone to share it with. After the fact. “People” are far too embarrassed to admit they were wrong. I’ve was wrong about so many things that I just couldn’t of understood without taking a step back. I was young. And young people are focused on stupid things. But that is no excuse. I’m not mad at others or myself anymore and for that I am grateful. I never would have guessed I would fall in love the way I do. Hopefully, I’ll look back and think of how childish it all is. Hopefully not. Love is meant to be magic. Two people don’t work out, the magic is not lost. The magic of what it was lasts forever. I suppose it is best to communicate through arbitrary means rather than send a letter or something that might be invasive. I have a hot sauce stain on my tye-dye sweater from learning how to cook. Nothing else is new. I’ve learned how to listen to music, but, ya know, it fluctuates. Writing won’t, but it won’t save me either. Don’t be a hero.